It's 12:35am and I'm laying in bed with the song, "Do you believe in Love?" by Huey Luis and the News playing over and over in my head. I can't tell you when the last time was that I heard that song. I hate that song, but yet at 12am when I should be sleeping, ol' Huey is telling me I, "better be believin' too". I was really tired at 10pm but instead of going to bed, I cleaned a bathroom, watched the news, ate a snack and checked my Facebook.
Sometimes I go threw bouts of insomnia. I have my whole life, but especially since I've been a mother, they seem to come more frequently. I'm different than most people in the sense that I dread bedtime. I love nap time, but bedtime isn't so much fun. I don't know why that is. I wonder if it's the fact that I know tomorrow I have to get up and do it all over again, so I try to postpone the inevitable as much as possible. Also, I just enjoy the silence that comes around 8:30. When the boys go to bed I watch my shows, do laundry, have a uninterrupted conversation with Jon...it's awesome.
It's not going to be so awesome however at 7:30 when Cole starts yelling, "MOE-MMY!" He doesn't ease into waking up like Jackson, instead he starts off with a bang.
As I'm sitting here in the wee hours of the morning, these are the things that are going through my brain:
1. I should get up and do my Bible study instead of lying here not sleeping.
2. The woman that wrote my Bible study is blind. I wonder what it would be like to be blind? How would I take care of my kids?
3. One of my girlfriends just had twins. These are numbers 4 and 5 for her. How does she do it? I can't handle two. She delivered them with no pain medication...naturally.
4. When do I want to have another baby?
5. What if it were a girl?
6. I didn't pray today..."Dear God..."
7. Jackson has the cutest prayers.
8. How do you get kids to stop eating boogers? Jackson is the booger-eating king. He told me yesterday that "I eat my boogers, cause that's what gives me my power."
9. Power...I really need to start working out. The only time I have is before the kids wake up or at nap time, and I'm not doing either one of those.
10. I need to call my grandma.
11. I wonder if when I get old, will I look like her or my mother's mother?
12. I miss my mother's mother.
13. She used to take me swimming in the summer.
14. I need to remember to get a White Water pass this year.
15. Then, I should be working out if I'm going to White Water.
16. I wish Jon would quit snoring.
17. Oh my gosh, I forgot that I was praying..."Father, God..."
18. I wonder if my household cleaning chemicals are dangerous?
19. What's more dangerous-cleaning chemicals or salmonella bacteria on my counter?
20. I should really set some chicken out to thaw for dinner tomorrow.
21. I'd rather go eat Mexican food.
22. I must be craving salt...pickles sound good right now.
23. I'd have to brush my teeth again and I'm not doing that.
24. I really need to bleach my teeth again, they're getting pretty dingy.
25. When is my next dental cleaning?
26. Jackson and Cole are going to need braces. I should start saving now.
27. Do you start saving for college for braces? Private school or a grocery bill for two teenage boys?
28. The topic of private school vs. public school. I need to pray about that.
29. Oh man, "God, I am so sorry..."
It's now 1:02, maybe I've racked my brain enough that I'll be able to sleep.